Know the signs
Dating Scams: How to Spot the Signs and Stay in Control
How scammers work, what the figures say and where to report.
A dating scam is when someone you meet online fakes a connection to get your money, your details or your images. The signs repeat across countries: a fast bond, a push to another app, dodged video calls and a story that ends in money. Never pay, keep the evidence and tell your bank.
How do dating scams work?
A bond that moves fast
Avon and Somerset Police list people who show strong feelings very quickly, and An Garda Síochána, the Irish police, say scammers build a bond fast.
A move off the site
The Garda say scammers try to take the chat off dating sites. The FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) says cryptocurrency investment scammers typically make first contact by text, on social media, through adverts or on dating apps, then quickly move the chat to a messaging platform.
No video, no meeting
Excuses to dodge live video calls or meeting in person appear on lists from Avon and Somerset Police, the Garda and Ireland’s FraudSMART.
A story that ends in money
Emergencies, travel costs and investments, say Avon and Somerset Police, with requests for gift cards or cryptocurrency. The US Federal Trade Commission (FTC) adds medical bills and wire transfers.
A faraway backstory
The FTC says scammers claim to live abroad, serve in the military or work on an oil rig.
Questions and photos
The Garda say scammers ask a lot of personal questions, and Ireland’s Competition and Consumer Protection Commission (CCPC) warns that intimate pictures sent to strangers can be used to blackmail you.
What do the official figures say?
| Counted by, and when | What it found |
|---|---|
| UK: City of London Police, 2025 | Over £102 million lost across 10,784 reports, with the number of reports up 29% on 2024. |
| UK: UK Finance, 2025 | 6,335 cases (up 22%) and £39.2 million lost (up 23%), counted from member banks and payment firms. |
| Ireland: An Garda Síochána, February 2024 | Over €7 million stolen in the five years before this release (13 February 2024). The 245 victims who came forward since 2020 lost €28,500 on average. |
| USA: FBI IC3, 2025 | $929,287,469 in reported losses from confidence and dating scams. |
What does the site do about scammers?
- Alerts you when someone tries to shift the chat onto another app such as WhatsApp, a common scam tactic.
- Uses AI to watch for unusual behaviour, and screens content on upload with AI and human review.
- Blocks instantly, reports easily and shows a reputation score that reflects behaviour and member feedback.
The terms say members use the site at their own risk, so your own checks come first. See the legitimacy guide, the safety page and meeting for sex safely.
Sextortion
What if someone threatens to share your images?
IC3 says shame and fear often stop people reporting. You have done nothing wrong by being targeted.
Stop and block
Stop all contact and block them everywhere, says the UK National Crime Agency (NCA).
Do not pay
The NCA says paying may not make the threats stop, and the Garda’s advice is simply not to pay.
Keep the evidence
Save messages, screenshots, links and bank details instead of deleting them, the NCA and the Garda advise.
Report it
UK: ring 101 for your local police, or 999 if you are in immediate danger. Ireland: any Garda station, plus Hotline.ie. USA: IC3, the FBI’s hub for cyber-enabled crime, which logged over 75,000 sextortion submissions in 2025.
Get images taken down
Adults can use StopNCII.org, which creates a digital fingerprint of your images on your own device and never downloads them. If you live in the Republic of Ireland, Hotline.ie asks platforms to remove images.
Thinking of sending images? Read the sexting tips first.
Where do you report a dating scam?
UK
Tell your bank at once if money has gone. Then call Report Fraud on 0300 123 2040, the service that took over from Action Fraud on 4 December 2025.
Ireland
Tell your bank at once, as FraudSMART advises, then report to any Garda station with copies of the messages and account details. Use the reporting tool of the site where it happened.
USA
Report to the FTC through its ReportFraud service and to the FBI’s IC3, and tell the app or site where you met the person. If you paid, contact the company you paid through, or your bank, at once.
Dating scams: your questions
How do I spot a dating scam?
Watch for a bond that forms very fast, a push to another app, excuses to avoid video calls or meeting, and a story that ends with a request for cash, gift cards or cryptocurrency.
What should I do if I have already sent money?
Contact your bank immediately, as Avon and Somerset Police, FraudSMART and the FTC all advise, then report to your country’s fraud service. Keep the messages and payment details, and send nothing more.
Can a dating site stop scammers?
No site can promise that. Local Sex Meets alerts you when someone tries to take a chat elsewhere, uses AI to watch behaviour and lets you block and report instantly, but its terms say members use it at their own risk.
What is sextortion?
Sextortion is blackmail: someone threatens to share intimate images or information unless you pay or do what they say. Stop contact, do not pay, keep the evidence and report it to the police and the site.
Sources and dates
General information, checked 3 November 2026. In a crisis, use the steps above.
- UK: City of London Police Report Fraud figures for 2025, reported by The Register (5 May 2026) and FStech (8 May 2026); UK Finance, Annual Fraud Report 2026 (15 June 2026); GOV.UK (4 December 2025); National Crime Agency; Avon and Somerset Police (22 May 2026).
- Ireland: An Garda Síochána (press release of 13 February 2024, cyber crime and sextortion advice); FraudSMART, from the Banking & Payments Federation Ireland; Competition and Consumer Protection Commission; Hotline.ie.
- USA: FBI Internet Crime Complaint Center, 2025 Internet Crime Report; US Federal Trade Commission; StopNCII.org.